Addendum: definition of love

quoted from Paradise, by Toni Morrison:

"The cross he held was abstract; the absent body was real, but both combined to pull humans from backstage to the spotlight, from muttering in the wings to the principal role in the story of their lives. This execution made it possible to respect - freely, not in fear - one's self and one another. Which was what love was: unmotivated respect."

unmotivated respect....wow.

whaddup?

i know i haven't been around for AWHILE. shame on me... i apologize to all 3 of my "regular" readers...

things that have been going on with me:

• dealing with the health issues of my sweetcakes.
• after dealing with health issues of my sweetcakes, chillin' the FUCK out.
• still chillin'.
• doing a lot of cooking... good stuff. my 3 readers can attest to that.
• improving my sh*t at work, getting on everyone's good side... just cuz. it's better that way.
• drinking shitloads of and becoming addicted to (again) coffee. starbucks french roast to be exact.... it's "extra bold", like me!
• not exercising.
• hanging out with my sister and her (our) crazy-ass friends. and laughing a lot. and ice-luge-ing...which is in a word, AWESOME!
• and constipation. despite eating double fiber bread, fiber one bars, and as of late, eating more vegetables.

in regards to the last issue, methinks that the handfuls of chocolate m&m's i shove into my mouth by the fistful after eating a healthy dinner, aren't helping. but they're SO good! they do their job and melt in my mouth! don't be nasty.... but it's SO good!

anyhoodle... today was a blah day. it was slow at work, due to 9/11. the day still messes with me. i try not to let it overwhelm me, but i know the tears are coming. i was so ANGRY that day. when i rode past the pentagon and saw it smoldering, i was angry. "how dare they?! in my country?! in my backyard?!" my dad used to work there, my dad at that time, still walked its halls occasionally. it was too close.

and while i was angry, i felt protective of every person of middle eastern descent. i wanted to wrap my arms around them, and tell them, "i'm so sorry, i know this isn't you." they have been some of the most kind, warm, and HONEST people i have ever had the fortune to know. and the fact that i had that warm, fuzzy feeling in my heart, despite the transgressions of their distant countrymen, let me know that we can move on, and build together. we do not have to cleave to the misgivings of our forefathers, of our fathers.

let's move on folks, let's move on. i'm tired of the same shit, and i'm concerned about the fate of this country if we don't move on from what we know, to what we should be doing. if we don't, this country will be shot to shit. let's respect the foundation our forefathers, and fathers built and use it as a platform to shift the paradigm that we depend upon for our bearings. our collective idea of this country, whether you want to admit it or not, is huge part of who we are, individually. we are americans, again, whether we like it or not, and our stance in the world affects our daily steps. quite frankly, our pride. don't get it twisted, i'm really, fucking, PROUD to be an american. that being said, i really care about the state of her, america, and i see right now that she's really sick. she needs our help, our care, our attention, our DEDICATION!

let's stick with what we know works and move towards solutions for the things that are broken. let's stop being stubborn and holding onto the whole "us vs. them" mentality. in the words of the poetic and hopefully prophetic rodney king, "can't we all just get along?" can't people allow their minds to move past stereotypes and to seek fellowship amongst each other? can't we soothe, hush, and embrace and let each other know it's going to be okay?

i'm tired. you know, you can put lipstick on a pig, and it will look prettier. particularly if it has full lips.

lub y'all.